Subvertisement – Heroinbetting plc – Issue 31

HeroInBetting plc says…Meet the team:

Desperate Dave – Always thinks the next one’s the really big one!

Delusional Don – In denial about how his schemes just don’t work.

Lord Aloof – He enjoys the luxury of being able to punt for fun, as his betting pool is inherited wealth and doesn’t touch his earned money.

Addicted Ade – You know you should get him to GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS but he would die rather than admit to it and go. Also, he doesn’t mind us laughing at rather than with him. Low self-esteem.

Cheating Charlie – he wheels and deals to an extent that a Philadelphian Lawyer would eschew. He just manages to keep his creditors at bay and keep them from doing their thing on his ass.

Linear Lol – Always sees his punts in a line regardless of the odds or likelihood of success and never takes advice.

Gullible Georgie Boy – Let’s the technology make his bets for him; he just clicks away in blissful ignorance of the leap of faith he shows in technology’s integrity. Never came down from the highs of his first GameBoy in the 90s.

Kami-Khazi Kev – He just goes for the most outlandish odds; and if he can’t find them immediately he’ll delve into bizarre forecasts, stack-betting etc. Doesn’t get upset as he has no semblance of an understanding of the value of money.

Lucky Lennie – No matter what he does – and he doesn’t have to do much – his punts come up. The exception to this good fortune ‘rule’ is every ten or twelve bets, especially the biggest potential earner, just when he’s ready to cash out, he loses it all. He’s got no method, no rhyme nor reason; it’s just blind luck.

Remember: When the fun stops and you can’t, you’re addicted. Glamorous and full of witty banter and teamwork? I wouldn’t bet on it!

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