Our Man In Hiatus – Issue 31

Apparently there’s a political purge on such places as Hiatus. It is a global attack on anywhere there appears to be nothing going on; no action; no productivity of any kind, especially warlike and profitable to conglomerates and business leaders. A number of tycoons, entrepreneurs, moguls, magnates, self-made men and women, have all contributed undisclosed sums of money in brown envelopes to the setting up of an agency to enact the edicts and diktats of private enterprise. The board of the agency is peopled by monetary contributors and some of their political cronies in government. However, their names have been changed on the documentation and in dispatches to protect the not-so-innocent.

The newly appointed private agency, Productivity Police plc, is entrusted with the task of ensuring that nowhere has nothing going on. To this end, the employees of the firm are dragging anyone in hiatus to their re-education blocks with the intention of making them do something. After helping the previous residents of hiatus back to full activity, the agents will rehouse them in a particularly productive town or city.

In a spirit of fairness the APPs will offer support and advice to the idle rich to develop their portfolios, and for them to return to hiatus as special residents.

There were to be protests at this draconian fairness but those who would have been involved were in hiatus, so were logically bound to do nothing, until too late.

Our man, always one to buck the trend, did manage to do something – he chained himself to the doors of one of the re-education blocks – but it was something he now regrets as his right arm was ripped off when the doors were automatically opened to allow the think tanks to emerge and converge on hiatus.

Gritting his teeth, our man tucked his empty sleeve into his handkerchief pocket, and followed the dismal throng, intent on dissenting against this narrow, materialistic lynch-mob.

Taking a shortcut, our man unearthed his best soap box, attached his hand made – in metalwork – clip-on lectern frame and unfurled his most eloquent and wordy speech about freedom of STEM.

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