“Never Mind The Quantity Feel The Wit.”
Oh, my head! Wh-what day is it?? The last thing I remember, it was September and I was drinking that fifth Campari and lemonade at the party to celebrate the coming-of-age of your ever-youthful, ever-truthful, not-always-ready-on-time satirical Behemoth that is The Inconsequential. I knew I shouldn’t have put that cherry in it!
So, twenty-one issues, eh? They grow up so fast, don’t they? One day, they’re nothing more than a pamphlet with three or four, admittedly hilarious, jokes in it, then almost overnight, eight years later, they’ve become the ninth deepest-thinking miscellany the world has ever looked at blankly. A success story to rival any that you might have the misfortune to read in Hiya! magazine or its ilk and all achieved through honest endeavour and a desire to share a genuine love of language with like-minded individuals. No money has changed pockets, no favours have been called in, no-one’s misfortune has been exploited to attain our exalted position in your heart, dear reader. We merely present our offerings for your bemusement, without seeking monetary gain, and are content to do so.
While we have absolutely no wish – or grounds for that matter – to portray ourselves as having higher moral and ethical values than the next man of the highest moral and ethical values, I’m sure you would agree that our artistic attitude is in stark contrast to, for example, certain Britartists (I hesitate to call them Young British Artists as most are pushing fifty). Their use of privilege and a branch of the Old Boy Network to create a niche that shouldn’t exist, then charging a gullible public an absurd sum for even more absurd talentless ‘Art’ just because they can, betrays and undermines the primary motivation for any artist, simply the desire to express themselves and convey their message in their own unique way. Theirs is a cynical and, sadly, successful attempt to manipulate the system and milk it thoroughly. Unfortunately, it’s the art lover who ends up being creamed.
The foregoing is, in a medium-sized nutshell, a somewhat obscure clue to our loose theme for this milestone edition of The Inconsequential: Opportunity and Opportunism.
Our Cover Story expounds at a length greater than is available here and you’ll find further nuggets on the subject will emerge from the following pages with a little judicious panning. As ever, our aim is to stimulate thought, but we hope you find a laugh or two along the way.
The key to unlocking our potential, both as individuals and as a species, is within each of us. If, before seizing an opportunity, we consider how it will affect others, then act in their best interests, we’ll be fine; if we think only how it will benefit ourselves, we’ll be finished. It’s up to you.